Aug. 17th, 2007

dalesql: (Pi)
This is a cell phone rant. You can ignore the rest.


Earlier this week, I was at the grocery store, cashing in my soda cans for the nickels. Having acomlished my mission, I bought some groceries and walked out of the store towards my car. Now, you understand that I live in a fairly upscale suburb of Boston. Mostly I can afford to live here because my grandfather built the house and sold it to my parents at cost. The other houses he built on the street, he sold for rather more money.
But anyway, I'm walking down the corridor towards the exit, The corridor is full of rows of shopping carts and so on, so there is not room for two people to walk past each other without needing to be introducing them to the other's parents. I'm sauntering along, enjoying the cool air before goign out into the heat, and there is this women most of the way to the other end yakking on her cellular phone.
I tune out her conversation as I'm walking along, but it is much louder now. She has turned around and is walking back towards me. I stand aside, as much as my girth allows, to give her room to squeeze by. I am, by the way, lugging a couple of plastic bags full of groceries, having put my shopping cart into the long row of carts standing ready to service future shoppers. (I try not to leave shopping carts out in the l=parking lot. I had worked as the cart boy in a supermarket as a kid. I lasted about two days, before being sunburned so bad that my mom took me to the doctor. )
This women, not slowing down her rapidfire yakking into the phone, glares at me and turns around again, and resumes her original direction of travel. S L O W L Y...... Looking over her shoulder tossing eyeball death lasers at me for having the affrontery to actually impede her progress.
Finally she gets to the door and moves outside. I step around her and proceed to my car, hoping that the flimsy plastic bags that the groceries are in don't finish rupturing and bleed my instant oatmeal and canned goods onto the asphalt. I'm juggling my keys and I hear this women screeching and shouting from halfway across the parking lot.
She is using a lot of yiddish curse words that I recognize, and no english words anymore. yelling into the phone and waving her other hand about as she is sauntering... no, sauntering is faster than this woman was moving. Take a step, screech half a sentence into the phone, another step. Pause to listen to a reply, take a step, unleash a response across the cell phone to her unseen opponent, glare at the car that is stopped behind her.
You see, she was doing this in the middle of the fire lane at the front of the parking lot, not crossing it, but proceeding down the length of it. Vaguely in the direction of the Starbucks that had sprouted there a few months ago.
Another car pulled up behond the first one that was stopped by this woman's majestic progress while I watched this, this, magnificant spectacle of rudeness. The woman shot laser beams of death at the drivers of both of these cars and continued her meander down the firelane, and her by now loud enough to be heard by the store clerks inside cell phone conversation. I saw one of them come out and stare, dumbfounded, at the sight.
One of the drivers got fed up and tooted his horn. Woman stares more eye-lazers of death at them and stops, still in the middle of the fire lane, still screeching into the phone. This annoys the driver enough that he leans on his horn, keeping it going for a long time. The woman, seeing her eye-lasers were not doing any good, stops her phone oration. Moving faster than I had yet seen her move, trots around to the driver's side, presumably to give the driver the what-for.
Both drivers, as soon as she is out from in front of them step on the gas, and drive out of the parking lot. Leaving this woman screeching in rage, still in the fire lane, while the grocery store clerks watch.
I get into my car and leave, having endured more rudeness and insensitivity in a couple of minutes that I normally get in a couple of weeks. I considered posting this when I got home, but decided to let it sit for a few days. It still stinks, and I pity all the people that have to interact with that lousy example of humanity. *sighs*

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